I have been wrestling with some things as I prepare to head on mission to Ghana. The main thing is this - "WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?" What do I really have to offer my team and the people in Ghana? This is such a massive and important job and I'm well... me! I know that I have many faults: I have a hard time expressing my thoughts verbally, I have a short temper and when it comes to sharing God's Word... I have never been very good at memorizing anything. My entire team seems to be experienced in missions and evangelism. I am left wondering if maybe I misunderstood Him... when I heard "mission" maybe He really said "soup kitchen". Hmmm...
Today, one of my mentors pointed out an important piece of scripture: "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him and have been called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28) It was pointed out to me that we often leave off the last half of that verse. He will work for the good, HIS good, if we love Him and are acting in accordance with His Will. If our hearts are aligned with God's heart... and we are focused on the things God is focused on... does it really matter that I am a poor speaker? Is that really going to affect God's plans? I am very small and minuscule when it comes to God's plans... but I am a part of God's plans nonetheless. "...Shall what is formed say to Him who formed it 'Why did you make me like this?'" (Romans 9:20) This isn't about what Connie will do in Ghana, it is about what GOD will do in Ghana. There is a reason I am going... He has a plan for me, with all my faults and failures, He wants me there I am asking God to "take me as I am" and to transform me into what He needs me to be, not that I may be glorified, but that HE may be glorified.
"Take me as I am 'cause I'm growing. I was too scared to start, now I'm too scared to let go." (- FM Static)
